Gestational Carrier Series - Chapter #3
This is a letter from a Gestational Carrier herself to help understand the GC’s prospective. This will conclude our GC series.
From the very first match meeting with our intended parents, I knew I made the right decision. I had finally found my purpose in life. I wanted to populate the world one surrogacy at a time. Ten years, six pregnancies and eight beautiful surrogate babies later, I have never regretted one minute.
I have wanted to be pregnant since before I can remember. I would walk around as a child with a pillow stuffed under my shirt. After my son was born, I thought “Well that wasn’t so bad!” I loved being pregnant! As life progressed, the opportunity never arose to have another child. When life finally slowed down enough to even think about it again, we realized that we no longer felt the desire to add to our already perfect family. We had three amazing boys through our blended family and couldn’t ask for more. I felt selfish that there were others that couldn’t experience the joy we did. I wanted nothing more than to do what I could to help as many families as I could.
In all honesty, applying with a surrogacy agency is truly the most intimidating and time-intensive process that I’ve ever been through. They are very thorough in the screening process and the thought “What if they don’t want me?”, “What if I’m not good enough to carry someone else’s baby?” terrified me. After months of work, tests, mental evaluations, etc. I was approved and matched. Prior to the match meeting with my potential Intended Parents, again I was plagued with “What if they don’t like me?” The match was perfect, as were all the matches to follow. I had been matched with married same-gender couples, single gay men, and a single straight female. These families lived all over the world and I loved every single one of them. I am honored and humbled that they choose me and trusted me to carry and protect their most precious treasures. We have forged long-lasting friendships and have become family, an extension of our already perfectly blended family.
I have heard all of the questions. “Why?” “Will it be hard to give up your baby?” “At least the money is good. How much do you make?” Some are truly genuinely interested in the surrogacy process. Others are just plain rude. Some are completely on board and then completely fall apart when they find out you are carrying for a same-gender couple. Some of the comments are truly hurtful. It hurts to hear that babies need a mother or that they should just adopt when you love your Intended Parents so much and feel their need to parent their own biological children. I have seen first-hand that my surrogate babies want for nothing and that includes love.
The money is minuscule when put in perspective. It’s like taking a job that works 24/7 for approximately a minimum of 10 months of your life. A job that includes exhausting pre-screening exams, self-administered injections, vaginal exams, nausea, vomiting, gestation, labor, etc. A single surrogate journey will usually last longer than a year. The basic breakdown of compensation equates to less than $2.28 per hour. It is more about giving the gift of life than the monetary compensation.
All of my deliveries were amazing. Seeing the Intended Parents hold their babies for the first time as a family made all the pain, injections, nausea, vomiting, labor and negative comments worth every second. I never had a secret desire to keep the baby as was always implied by those that just don’t understand the true fulfillment a surrogate gets helping to create a family.
I watch all of these children grow, change, and evolve into amazing human beings I know they are and smile often knowing that I had a small part in that.
Our intention by sharing this piece is to help Intended Parents who are considering using a GC.
My name is Jordan. I am the newest addition to Spring Creek Fertility. I recently graduated from the University of Dayton with my Master’s of Physician Assistant Practice. I am from Minneapolis, Minnesota but was born in New Mexico. In my past life, I was a flight attendant for a regional airline out of Minneapolis. In my free time I like to work out, travel, and go on adventures